Thoughts
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Talking about failure and vulnerability

Just finished reading an interesting article called after failure what next?
It resonated deeply with the ebook that I wrote called Congratulations! You failed
One of the important points in the article was talking to everyone about your failure.
What a hard thing to do.
We live in a society where you ALWAYS put your best face forward.When you first meet someone the first question is “So what do you do?” which can sometimes be translated into..this conversation going well may largely depend on whether I think what you do i impressive enough.

Brene Browns TED talk about vulnerability hit home for so many people because we are dying to be vulnerable. 
We are dying to be vulnerable with each other but we cant because we are afraid.

Talking about your failures is so scary, and it requires that you be vulnerable enough to say that you did.

I feel vulnerable about talking about my failures because it means that I am not good enough.
I want to matter, I want to contribute, and failing at something just means that ..I do not add up.
Forget all the talk about failing forward, its just a phase etc….it still sucks to fail.
It sucks to talk to people about it that offer a band aid to the gaping wound that is your life.

There does lie a freedom in talking about your failures though.To finally let it out.
If you do it slowly that is okay, just don’t keep it quiet forever, because then you will never get over the failure itself.
In the ebook I caution who you talk about your failure with, and in the article Brain Feld does the same. 
In my experience talking about it first with people that matter to you worked better than talking to EVERYONE about it. 
Like it or not people can really be nasty about failure, surprisingly, because everyone has failed at something one time or another. So how about a little more empathy?
A little less advice and more listening?
How about a little more vulnerability, for yourself and for others?

xoxo

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