I know you’ve seen it. Journaling has taken the world by storm. People all over the globe are journaling their way to success in business, weight loss and reimagining what their lives can be like simply by journaling.
Jim Rohn says, “If you’re serious about becoming a wealthy, powerful, sophisticated, healthy, influential, cultured, and unique individual, keep a journal.”
What about your relationships? What can journaling change in your relationships by keeping a journal? I am glad you asked.
Here are 5 ways journaling can refresh and renew the way you communicate with your partner.
- A safe place to unload all those icky emotions – That’s right. Maybe you’ve been annoyed with your partner for a while and you havent expressed your displeasure. You’ve kept those feelings bottled up and what usually happens is you vomit all those icky feelings at once ( usually triggered by something that is not related at all – like WHY MUST YOU WASH THE WHITES WITH THE COLOURS?! IN FACT THIS IS WHY OUR BILLS ARE NOT PAID ON TIME!). These bottled feelings can turn into resentment and this is dangerous. These explosions can leave your partner feeling hurt, assaulted and rejected. They walk around on eggshells because they never know what little thing will cause the cascade of emotions coming from you. Journaling can help you unload these feelings and help you let the frustration out. You are then able to process these feelings and look at them objectively. Is this true? Is there an underlying issue? Journaling can help you complain without blame.
- Reminds you of what you love about your partner – when you journal a gratitude list of the amazing things your partner does for you ( it could be the small daily things like making you that cup of tea in the morning, or monthly like filling up your car with gas) you are reminded why you love your partner, and you are constantly reminded how they are trying even when it seems like they are not. It also helps you realise that the partner that you have is perfect for YOU and you keep comparison at bay. With your partners’ good qualities right in front of you often, you can come up with different ways to show your appreciation.
- Outline your relationship/family vision – Journaling can reveal to you what is important for your relationship or family life. It helps you track the points that are really important to you and how you can structure your relationship and family around these important topics. When you identify these important topics, you can then sit with your partner and plan, with excitement, the direction you want to go. This is an amazing feeling to know you are in the same boat, flowing in the same direction.
- Reveals what YOU like – Journaling can reveal to you what you really like. Looking for more adventure in the bedroom? Wanting more intimacy? When you journal your feelings, wants and desires, you get clear about what you would like to try, or what you would like more of and can communicate this with your partner. Journaling can also help you notice if you would like more of the same thing, which is perfectly fine! Little notes with the delicious descriptions of what you want ( that have come from you unloading in this safe space of your journal) can result in lots of pleasure for both of you.
- Journaling keeps you connected with yourself – Staying connected with yourself helps keep you connected with your partner because you know your wants and needs, you offload all the confusion and negativity before you approach your partner, and you are true to what you really want. You can communicate what you clearly need and your partner is not left guessing because they know you take the time to speak your truth.
There are many journals that you can buy that are very helpful in structuring our thoughts and feelings, but a simple notebook can also serve as a journal. Forget about making it pretty or if your grammar is correct. The important thing is to get it all on paper. Combine the journaling with reflection and action to follow through on what you have journaled. This is the most powerful part.